Why Donald Trump Should Not Be Indicted While in Office

According to open source reporting and social media, at this very moment, Russia is in the midst of a massive military buildup on their border with Ukraine.

Hundreds of tanks, likely thousands of troops, and God only knows what kind of firepower are massing. And they’re being given a pretext thanks to Russia’s now-familiar preliminary bombardment of fake news, allegations, and disinfo.

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George H.W. Bush Death Conspiracy Theories

The death of former president George H.W. Bush on Friday marked the first passing of a POTUS in the social media age.

It also marked the first death of a president in the age of the instant internet conspiracy – a place where the secret misdeeds of the powerful aren’t whispered about in free pamphlets and public access TV shows, but by millions of people with instant access to each others’ lamebrained opinions.

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Conspiracy Theorist Excuses for Losing the Midterms!

Every election cycle seems a little more beset by conspiracy theories, outrageous and unfounded accusations, and bizarre plots. They get weirder, and yet more normal at the same time.

The conspiracy theory community has mobilized to support Donald Trump and his fellow Republicans. And they’re going much further than anything that happened to John McCain in 2000,  desperately trying to shore up their support with suburban white women by terrifying them into a thinking a rape caravan of ISIS invaders is (very slowly) making its way north to take their jobs, force them to drive electric cars, and treat refugees humanely.

But one day before the election, polling for the House of Representatives doesn’t look good, nor does it look good for Republicans to keep their death grip on state legislatures.

And if there’s one thing conspiracy theorists are good at, it’s making excuses for why the stuff they theorized didn’t come to pass.

So here are a few of the most prevalent excuses you’re likely to see on conspiracy theory social media if the election really does go the way it’s looking:

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There’s Got to Be a Morning After the Midterms

In case you haven’t been paying attention to the news, the United States is about to hold its quadrennial midterm election, where the entire House of Representatives, one-third of the Senate, thousands of local legislature seats, and numerous governorships are all up for grabs.

It’s being called the most important vote of our lifetimes, a hyperbolic phrase applied to every recent election.

Liberals think it’s going to be our last chance to stop Donald Trump from “consolidating power,” rolling back our freedoms, putting soldiers in the streets, mass incarceration of enemies in FEMA Camps, and executing his final plan to declare himself President God King for Life.

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“Motivated by Conspiracy Theories”

To state the obvious, pipe bomb maker Cesar Sayoc and Pittsburgh synagogue shooter Robert Bowers were violent, paranoid, hate-filled dwellers in the pervasive discourse of such people: conspiracy theories.

The targets of their ire were different. Sayoc was a hardcore Trump acolyte who felt that oppositional Democrats were the scourge of America, while Bowers appears to have disdained Trump for not doing enough to cleanse America’s REAL scourge – the Jews.

But both wanted their foes disposed of in the same way –  a violent purging that spared no one they felt was not sufficiently on their side.

It’s a race war fought on obscure message boards and Fox News alike, pumping out anti-Semitic and violent conspiracy theories to broken minds who have no ability to discern fact from fiction.

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These are self-proclaimed patriots who see themselves as the vanguard of a new digital war, where hearts and minds are won with memes, anonymous legions of soldiers fight by “digging” into people’s pasts, and anyone not sufficiently with them must be destroyed.

But when their memes and social media bitching didn’t get the job done, Sayoc and Bowers resorted to what paranoid killers have always resorted to when words aren’t cleansing the filth fast enough – bombs and bullets.

Their actions aren’t random. Their motives aren’t mysterious.

And they aren’t alone.

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