Conspiracy Theorist Excuses for Losing the Midterms!

Every election cycle seems a little more beset by conspiracy theories, outrageous and unfounded accusations, and bizarre plots. They get weirder, and yet more normal at the same time.

The conspiracy theory community has mobilized to support Donald Trump and his fellow Republicans. And they’re going much further than anything that happened to John McCain in 2000,  desperately trying to shore up their support with suburban white women by terrifying them into a thinking a rape caravan of ISIS invaders is (very slowly) making its way north to take their jobs, force them to drive electric cars, and treat refugees humanely.

But one day before the election, polling for the House of Representatives doesn’t look good, nor does it look good for Republicans to keep their death grip on state legislatures.

And if there’s one thing conspiracy theorists are good at, it’s making excuses for why the stuff they theorized didn’t come to pass.

So here are a few of the most prevalent excuses you’re likely to see on conspiracy theory social media if the election really does go the way it’s looking:

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There’s Got to Be a Morning After the Midterms

In case you haven’t been paying attention to the news, the United States is about to hold its quadrennial midterm election, where the entire House of Representatives, one-third of the Senate, thousands of local legislature seats, and numerous governorships are all up for grabs.

It’s being called the most important vote of our lifetimes, a hyperbolic phrase applied to every recent election.

Liberals think it’s going to be our last chance to stop Donald Trump from “consolidating power,” rolling back our freedoms, putting soldiers in the streets, mass incarceration of enemies in FEMA Camps, and executing his final plan to declare himself President God King for Life.

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When Impeachment and Re-Election Collide

 

Democrats are riding a wave of anti-Trump outrage into the 2018 midterms, while Republicans find new ways to describe their discomfort at President Trump’s long, public breakdown.

Beyond that, historical precedent already puts the party in the White House behind the 8-ball. The House has changed parties four times since World War II: 1954, 1994, 2006, and 2010. All four were midterm elections where the president’s party lost control.

If that trend holds, Democrats will re-take the House, probably by a wide margin. And if that happens, it’s a safe bet that impeachment will follow. In fact, I wouldn’t be shocked if the first thing a newly Democratic House does is take a vote to authorize the House Judiciary Committee to begin an impeachment investigation, especially if Special Council Robert Mueller’s final report recommends it.

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